So apparently my assumptions about being a "its been a while" date were a little premature. I have another date on Friday. He will see I'm just as mediocre at tennis as I was with pool.
I've had two bloody noses today. I usually don't have problems with the lack of humidity here in Utah. I hardly ever need lotion to keep my skin hydrated. I only go through brief phases when I need chap-stick. These, however, are only mere inconveniences. A day or two of bloody noses when the humidity shifts is more of a frustration. Its not like you can lotion your nose to stop it from being irritated. My allergies have picked up too so the congested bloody mess in my nasal cavity is kind of gross. I just hope it won't bother me tomorrow because I really want to go on a long run on Monday.
So do you know what is more lame than a bloody nose. Unrequited infatuation. Its interesting how I can remind myself that "he's not asking me out" or "he's not going out of his way to spend time with me", yet my thoughts and emotions still go everywhere when I hear his name mentioned, see him enter the room, etc. I know I don't want anything to happen unless he is genuinely interested. I know that although he does have a lot of qualities I value, that doesn't necessarily mean things would work if he was interested. Regardless, the thoughts and emotions are still there. Stupid spring fever...
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I just looked him in the face and said I was interested. That's something Mailee would tell me to do. I know part of me wants to hear him say flat out that he's not interested and won't ever think of me as anything more than a friend. Then a more logical side of me says his actions are communicating this just as well and I need to be a big girl and get over it. BAH!
This writing exercise is my first step of admitting "I have a problem." Now I'm going to stop mulling about this whole situation and read about "Crucial Conversation Tools". G'night.
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