Picnicking

I've had this image flittering around in my head for a few days so I've finally decided to share it. I think it sounds deliciously cheesy and delightfully picturesque.

I'd put on my picnic dress and my straw sun hat and he'd put on his suspenders and cap and the two of us would stroll arm in arm to the park. In a wicker basket he'd whip out pb&j's and other picnicky sorts of foods, and then we'd eat and chat as we lounged on a grassy knoll. Afterwards we'd fly kites, feed the ducks, throw around a frisbee, etc.



Conclusions I've made
1) I really am a romantic at heart, even if I don't care for books like Twilight.
2) I ought to keep going on dates even though I feel too busy or unmotivated to go. I wouldn't want to be on such a schmoozy sort of outing if it were a first date. I need to actually find someone to date and then suggest we make this day happen.
3) I need to stop dawdling away what little time I have on this blog and get back to work so the whole time thing is less of an issue.

Jillian Gray

So I went dancing last night and THREE different people asked if I was in HIGH SCHOOL or college. I could hardly believe it. True, the room was only half lit and I am a short, energetic, playful sort of girl but REALLY? High School... Imagine how awkward it was when they realized I was done with college. I didn't bother to mention I've been done with college for three years.

Maybe this is the result of that oil painting I started of Deseret and I. Have you read the book "The Portrait of Dorian Gray"? Well, I take this as evidence that I'm turning into a Jillian Gray and while my portrait turns into an old woman with gray hairs, wrinkles and such I'll still young forever.

Too bad. I've been looking forward to that phase of my life when I can strut into bingo wearing some leopard print pants, mismatched socks, and a teddy bear sweater vest. Doesn't quite work when I look like this.



Jill Age 19

Where I'll be in ten years.

Have you ever played the game "Where will you be in ten years?". I've been thinking about the future quite a bit. I kind of wish I was in a 4th grade English class so I could write this response in a writing journal. I guess my blog will have to do.

I'll move to Saudi Arabia and work as a Med Tech for a few years. They earn 6 digit incomes there so, technically, if I worked there at least 10 years, I'd come back to the states as a millionaire.

At some point I'd get married and then my husband and I could raise our brood to ride camels, charm snakes, build awesome sand castles, and eventually, after touring the pyramids and visiting Jerusalem, we'd come back to the states. The kids would be rather popular in school since they'd have the allure of being exotic, growing up in a foreign country, even if it was for a little bit.

This is a picture I drew of the family vacation at the pyramids. I think my husband looks particularly rigid in that blue turban.



Well, this was me really not wanting to take some returns to Walmart and do my taxes but play time is up. Back to responsibility.

Real Hug

I was having a lousy day at work today and one of my coworkers gave me a hug and it made me realize that I really need a REAL hug. One of those hugs where you feel small and safe and they're squeezing you hard and you don't have to let go after two seconds. Thinking about it, it doesn't seem to make a lot of sense since somebody holding you tight won't really fix anything or REALLY make it better. However, emotions in general seem to ignore logic quite a bit. Crying, for example, also make us feel better but does that really make a whole lot of sense? I think that if I got a really good hug just about now, all of this emotional muddled mleh going on inside of me would just melt away and I'd stop over thinking things through like a rational human being again.

Pee in a cup

Today I was doing an urine eosinophil test and noticed the slide was laden with Calcium Oxalate crystals. It made me realize that... I miss urinalysis.

Most hematology departments do urinalysis but microbiology at Mayo claimed it for their own. Yes, it is sought after lab test. That may sound weird and gross to many (probably most) of you but if you ever tried working in a hospital's laboratory you'd realize why. You find lots of neat stuff, particularly the crystals. Its like finding Rupies in the Zelda games. Here are some images to show you just how pretty urine can be.


Calcium Oxalate like what I saw on my slide today.


Tyrosine. I saw this one on a Urine Eos slide the other day too which shocked me since its fairly rare. For any ladies that noted my urinalysis chart I used to have hanging in the bathroom of my old apartment at CT, this was one of 3 things I never did see on a urinalysis slide.


Starch. They like to say it makes a maltese cross but I'm pretty sure most of us don't know what maltese means. If you look up just the word maltese it pulls up a bunch of dogs which I guess are also maltese.


Uric Acid with calcium oxalate. It's pretty fun with multiple crystals all on the same slide.


Yeast with hyphae.

Well, unfortunately for me, urinalysis won't be coming back to Hematology/Pathology. We do get to look forward to Bone Marrow Smears, Platelet Aggregation Assays, Cytology, etc. but for now I'll just have to reminisce on those fond memories of Crystals, budding yeast, fluttering trichamonas, etc.

Embracing Valentine's Day as a Single Woman

That's right. Its Valentine's Day and I'm single. Many single woman take this as a cue to be depressed however I really feel this day ought to be celebrated. I love love in all its forms, platonic, familial, romantic, etc. and even if I don't have a man I can still celebrate. Look at all the great things you get to do on a day like today!

1. Sing Love Ballads. I like to sing them loud and with gusto. Things like "Can you feel the love tonight", "Michelle" by the Beatles (particularly the "I love you I love you I LOAOAVE you." line), Pt IV of Broken Bride, etc.

2. Eat chocolate. I don't need a man or a holiday to indulge but its good to have the excuse just the same.

3. Flowers. I used to have flowers on my table on a regular basis. Since I haven't explored AZ enough to figure out good locations for wild flowers, my table has been rather un-decored as of late. After V-day is a great time to get lovely flowers for cheap. I hope I can find sunflowers since they're my favorites.



4. Watch Chick Flicks and other girly media. Don't watch too many movies nowadays but for starters you should take a second to watch some of the Brawny Man commercials because I find them rather amusing.







5. Flaming Heart Socks. Because this is the one day during the year that I proudly wear them. I keep them as a "I really need to do my laundry because I've got no socks left but these" reminder and for this one special time of year.

Happy V-day!!!

Poetry is the food of love

Its been a while since I've written any poetry and I had a few ideas I wanted to attempt to throw together in a poem or two sooo.... here you go.

Snowboarding

You're seated on a throne ascending higher and higher
The world glitters around you, immaculate and bright
You rise up higher still, to the tops of the mountains
Glide off your thone and begin to fly.

You're soaring through the clouds though you have no wings.
The powder billows and cushions your every move.
They call it a board, but its more a large blade
and ever so smoothly you carve out your soul.

Its more than freedom as you blaze away like a comet
Its more than peace found in such pristine beauty.
Its happiness. Pure simple sweet happiness.
Thats why snowboarding feels just like heaven.


Differential

They sent me a part of you in a small stoppered tube.
Still warm, still bright, still full with the life of you.
With a slick fluid movement, I spread you quite thin
To stain you, examine you, uncover whats within.

With lenses and condensers the light takes its focus
Illuminating those things that were once mysterious
With a scan I can see your darker disease
I gaze in closer and read you with ease.

You may see cancer cells, the reactive left shift,
They are present enough, rather hard to miss
But do you see the woman with a fire in her eye.
Still ferociously living, refusing to die.

Many judge on outside looks, and foolishly set aside
Their sight on the whole picture, who the person is inside.
But to clearly see what is within, you must still see the outside
Or you'll see nothing but blood, just blood on a slide.

Childish

My life is undergoing a lot of big changes. I know God is in total control and that everything will work out for the best but... I always envisioned things being different. I sometimes see myself with my limited understanding and foresight as a scruffy looking two year old to God. Something like this.



As a young child I would go play on the slide for long stretches of time trusting that my parents would ALWAYS catch me. Even if they were on the other side of the lawn and if for some unheard of reason they didn't notice me before it was too late... Then I'd cry and cry like it was the ultimate betrayal.

Well, I imagine myself as this child tugging on Heavenly Father's sleeve. He kneels down so that I can tell Him the facts. This is the way things are gonna be.

"I'm going be a professional dog sled racer. I found the perfect coat."
"I'm going to eat ice cream for every meal."
"I'm going to make my own rocket and fly to the moon so I can make a quesadilla out of moon cheese."
"I'm going to move to Arizona, work cushy day shifts at the Mayo Clinic, meet the future love of my life, and live happily ever after."
"I need to eat the macaroni and cheese from this box RIGHT NOW."

God knows I can't REALLY borrow the neighbor's chihuahua puppy for this envisioned dogsled team, that if I eat ice cream every meal I'll become sick and fat, that I can't build a functional rocket out of cardboard, and that some good things, like macaroni and cheese, take time to make right. As I howl because I have to wait a whole ten minutes for the noodles to cook, to deal with the fact that my roommate is moving to Michigan, that my dating life is more complicated than it was in Provo, that I'm expected to work obscene amounts of overtime, that I feel like I ought to be so much more than what I've become, he just smiles down at me, kisses me on the forehead, and holds me tight until I manage to stop blubbering. He whispers that I need to be strong and that He has everything under control and it'll be just fine.

So this is me, signing out from my seat at the top of life's roller coaster, waiting for the plummet and trusting that at God's amusement park, if I keep my seat belt fastened and arms and legs inside the car, that things can be fun, safe, and terrifying at the same time.

Dehydration

So, I went hiking yesterday and didn't drink a whole lot of water because I wasn't thirsty. BAD DECISION!! As a result my body went into operation shut down at about 10pm yesterday.

It started with a little headache and a dry tongue. I didn't take long for me to realize I was dehydrated, but at this point it was a little too late to chug a liter and make it all go away... Then that headache erupted into a migraine and I started to feel really queasy. Being a medical professional, I prescribed myself to take some Ibuprofin, curl up in my bed with a full Camelbak and wait things out until the morning.

Wellll... I didn't wake up with a head ache but now I'm having all sorts of strong yet strange food cravings. Flax seeds, marzipan, and fresh peaches. If it wasn't Sunday I'd probably run to the store and buy some marzipan and peaches but I'll have to settle with the bag of flax... Yep...

Moral of the Story: Jill needs to take care of herself or WEIRD stuff happens. I guess I could have worse problems than periodic Flax seed binges...